It happened AGAIN, folks! WHY? WHY do all y'all keep letting me go back to the store in which The Girls were exposed? Because now ... today ... another Exposing. And not The Girls this time. This had to do with The Zipper being down. All the way down. Completely open and gaping. Yep.
Why me? And what with the cameras ... and already the film of The Girls on display as I wandered the store ... seriously .... why do y'all let me out of the house every morning? You should be offering assistance ... like a Keeper or something. Ya know, because it's obvious that help is needed here! Seriously!!
And this time I'm left wondering just how long The Zipper was down today. Because I KNOW I didn't just use the restroom and then leave straight for lunch. There was time wandering around the office in between. Ruh-roh ... there was also the CEO coming into my office to discuss a client and me putting feet up on desk to lean back while discussing. Uh yeah ... can you say "pants gaping open"??? Was the restroom before or after that?? Before or after??? Oh GOD, I DON'T REMEMBER!!!!
Oh man .... now I need a new grocery store AND a new job. CRAP! What panties am I wearing? Please lord, let there be panties! Whew! At least there is that!
Seriously .... I'm taking applications for a Keeper. It's either that or I need to start dressing only in pull-on pants and pull-over sweatshirts, I'm thinkin'.
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4 comments:
But see even in the pull on pants...you could fail. As a dear co-worker found out. You could spend the whole day with your pants on backward.
You should just get a "handler" sweetie...one that can assist with the toothpick knitting :)
And screen your emails! That would be awesome. Double points if he looks like Jason Statham. (And if that's not your thing, send him up north my way, will you?)
The whole day? I think thats a good sign that your back end fits in the front end of your pants.
Hmm CEO, zipper down, compromising position...that'll be the first!
U.M. - You and George Costanza, eh?? :)
Anon - don't think I don't know who you are there, B! ;)
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