Thursday, October 27, 2005

Craigslist bashing is back!

Ah yes, the Craigslist personals. I've been too busy to peruse them lately for blog fodder. But, by request, here are a few of my latest faves.....

Any woman with Big Boobs that is okay with Mr Superficial.

[good to see you've your priorities straight, buddy! And quite the perfect name for you!]

Why can't YOU sweep ME off of MY feet? - 25 (Downtown/SW)

[demanding much??]

Looking for a nice Jewish girl to sleep with!! - 29 (ne pdx)


Nasty boy looking for his forever whore. - 36 (Portland)

[aah. Very, very touching. Just brings a tear to my eye. Sigh.]

MWM seeks Married or Attached Woman - 38 (Portland)

[you suck, Married Man.]

Top Heavy: Look here! and be appreciated long term - 36 (Portland)

[ANOTHER Boob Man. But at least I give this one credit for using the phrase "top heavy". Adds an element of class to it, dontcha think??!]

Wanted: summer girlfriend (Portland)

[Okay, so I read this one ... because hello? ... what? And really, he's "taking applications" for a girlfriend for next summer. Good luck with that, buddy!]

i snort cocain and fuck like a banchie warrior! - 35 (where ever i want to be!)

[Looooooser .... moving on]

no bitchy women - 37 (Portland)

[damn ... rules me out!]

Adventurous $$ MILLIONAIRE seeks companion - 25 (Beaverton / Wash. Co)

[you mean, "seeks WHORE", right? (let's tell it as it is)]

breasts, breasts, Breasts, and MORE BREASTS! - 32

[okay, this one we gotta read]

Reply to:
Date: 2005-10-26, 8:42PM PDT

My mind is focused on one thing. I'll let you guess what it is. I'm not in perfect shape, but I am very good looking. You aren't Twiggy/Kate Moss thin, but you are quite attractive (and not a bbw). I just want to stare at your chest. The anonymity of craigslist allows me to be this honest [uh yeah ... but to actually MEET the person they'd have to see who ya are. Unless you're wearing a mask. Oooh, oooh.... but then you could call yourself the "Boob Bandit" or something!] I really, REALLY just want to snuggle close to your beautiful pair, and if you're smart and witty and wonderful, that would just be the icing on the breast, err, cake.

Only reply if you like that I like to think about ... you know. They drive me CRAZY!

[seriously, dude .. you're 32?? Are you sure you're not like 22? Or 12 maybe? Because it depresses me to think of someone so shallow and such IN THEIR 30'S. There is more to a woman than breasts .... really.]

It's 9 inches - 26 (Downtown)

[speaking of shallow. Here's a man that thinks size is the end-all, be-all.]

I want to spoil a hot sexy smart fun naughty rock n roll babe - 33 (me and you)

[hallelujah! Pick me! Pick me! I love to be spoiled!!! (Oh wait ... that's not Craigslist bashing. Sorry.)]

And there ya have it. It appears that there are still plenty o' crazy men out there!

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