Wednesday, March 21, 2007

I won't use the term "deadbeat"....

Hi y'all! Thanks for all your kind words and comments! There has since been a 4th date! So here's the latest.

I didn't have to come up with any scary topics (though I appreciate all your good suggestions!) because we decided to actually talk "serious". And when I say "serious", I'm talking about all those taboo subjects ... like politics and religion. And the REALLY scary one .... "what are you looking for in a mate?" (his topic, if you can believe it).

Now, it was really nice to see that even though we label ourselves differently, we both seem very similar in our views on politics, religion and life in general. However (y'all heard that "however" coming right?) ... we did differ on one topic. One very BIG topic.

Unfortunately, I just read the book The Law Of Attraction and the gist of the book is what you focus on you will get more of. So it suggests not talking about the negative of things since that puts your focus on the negative which The Universe hears and responds to.

So .... I am racking my brain to come up with something positive (even if opposite) which will clue you in to this "trait" of his.

(*insert fingers drumming on desk*)

OH! I know! I will give you the opposite. Let's see .... the positive that I'm sending out to The Universe would be ...... I love a man with a job! (ahem)

Yep, I love me a man with a job!! I'd say I love a man with a strong work ethic ... but really, in this case, just ANY work ethic I'm thinkin' is good! And though I appreciate and respect my date's Zen approach to life (no really... I do), I am looking to partner with someone who will equally contribute to building a secure future for the two of us. And again, I said "equally contribute" ... I am not looking for a "sugar daddy" (though Universe ... I said "sugar daddy" ... did you catch that??? :)).

So yes, though I enjoy this man's company and though he is frickin' gorgeous (can I get a "hell yeah!" from Ms C (she's seen his picture)) .... I am looking for an equal partner in life. So Universe, thank you very much for bringing a man into my life who closely matches what I am looking for in a partner. His intelligence, artistry, sensualness, kindness, religious and political views, willingness to laugh at my quirks rather than run in fear, cultural interests, and the ease of which he laughs are all great joys to me. I am certainly looking forward to the next man with similar traits but whom actually believes in working for a living! (Oh, and who is maybe a wee bit taller too!!) Okay, thank you!!! :)

So there you have it .... the latest dating update. He is a pretty cool person and I can see him integrating with my friends very easily. I still don't know him well enough to know if he would be up for that .... but hopefully. I'll keep you updated!!

In the meantime, dear Universe ..... I'm thinkin' of George Clooney, George Clooney, George Clooney! (hey, it can't hurt!)


ms c said...

hell yeah he's gorgeous!...if indeed that's the real "him" and not some photo you pulled out of a fashion magazine. so the downside is that he doesn't have a j-o-b. well, hell, neither do i and i consider myself a good catch. and i will have a job some day, really.

as much as i believe in the law of attraction, it's really stressful, isn't it, to always be on the look out for negative thoughts? i've decided to just stop thinking :o)

Kat said...

You ARE a great catch, Ms C. I absolutely admire your choices. You are living your dream (you GO, girl!!!).

And maybe he is too. Which is awesome! It's just that (based on past experience) I know that I need a man who pulls his fair share financially. And around the house. And ... well, with everything There can be trade offs, of course, ... but I need to feel that each person is making an equal contribution somehow. And his definition of "equal contribution" was SOOO not mine

And yes, the positive thought process is just that ... a process! I think I need to reread the chapter about how to eliminate doubts. It talks about how abundant everything is. Like wonderful men! And money! Blah, blah, blah (is "blah, blah, blah" negative??? .... hehehe)

Ava said...

how do you eliminate negative thoughts?

goodgirl036 said...

When you catch yourself thinking negatively, change your thought. YOu can acknowledge the thought and let go of it, by saying for instance 'That thought doesn't reflect who I am right now in this moment' and let it go. Then think the opposite or a more positive thought. For instance, "I will never lose weight" can be replaced with "I am healthy and happy" or " I am losing weight in a healthy manner". I include healthy so not to get some sickness that will have me lose weight quickly...LOL

Kat said...

Yes, Ava, like Goodgirl said. I think the first key is Awareness. Start noticing the negative thoughts and flip it around. The book I mentioned said to use the phrase "well, what do I want then?". So if, for instance, you're sitting in traffic and you think "man, I HATE traffic". Stop and think "well, what do I want then?" and come back with the positive energy of "I LOVE traffic that flows!!!!" My guess is that over time the positive thoughts start to take precedence as you begin to retrain yourself to think more positively.

Teresa said...

For more on this subject, there's a good movie called The Secret, which I believe came out in 2006 and was directed by Drew Hariot...check it out if you have the time.

Kat said...

hehehe. Funny that you should mention that movie/book, teresa. I've had eleventeen hundred people mention it to me since December. And I did watch the dvd in January. I do recommend it. Oprah even did a two part series on that movie/book recently. It is HUGELY popular right now!

Ava said...

Thanks everyone for the good advice! Netflix has The Secret; I'll check it out.

T1 said...

Equal say doing all the cleaning and cooking and laundry??

Would that work?

Kat said...

Dude, there is SOOOO little cooking, cleaning and laundry between me and the cats. Seriously, it could all be done in two hours a week (I'm not saying it GETS done ... I'm just saying it COULD! So no, I prefer my man goes to work for his equal contribution.

Now, a lot of households are much more high maintenance than mine. Like those with kids. In which case, the person staying home to keep house and raise the kids is SOOOOO pulling their fair share (plus some). But in my household .... not even close. Pushing the start button on the dishwasher once a week and doing two loads of laundry does not equate to my 40 hours at the office! (did ya catch that I said "40 hours at the office" and not "40 hours of WORK"?? Cuz ... well, ya know ... hehe)

ms c said...

kat, where are you? i was hopin' for an update. oh wait, let's see: "it's good that Kat hasn't updated her blog because now i can go back to sitting in the sun on the beach at the Sea of Cortez with my cerveza." dang, i got this positive thinking thing down to a science.