Okay, folks. After much searching ..... and after much wasted time attempting to buy a new one ... and, of course, after much cussing, I have finally found The Battery Charger. Hallelujah and praise the Lord!!!!!
I found it cowering under my bed. Yes, there seemed to be mumblings of "please don't make me go to Europe where they use higher voltage .... please God no". Pathetic, really. I showed it itself in a mirror so it could see the word "Charge" emblazoned across its front and explained that "Charge!" was a battle cry of fearless warriors who would never fear something as silly as a "higher voltage". But alas, it was having none of that! Insipid little twit.
Ah well.
The good news is that it is unafraid of working its hiney off here in The States. So work it I did. And now ... we have a working camera! Whoo hooo!
So, without further ado ... here are the pictures that The Sock wanted to share with you of its trip. Other non-sock photos to be posted in later blog entries.
The Sock with The Statue of Liberty:
The Sock at Rockefeller Center:
The Sock with the Manhattan Skyline (taken from the Staten Island Ferry):
The Sock at the top of the Empire State Building:
The Sock saying "please God ... stop with the STAIRS":
The Sock at the NY Stock Exchange (The Sock thought this was the NY SOCK Exchange and was hoping it could swap one of my plain sneaker socks (that also came along for the trip) for something a little more Manhattanite. But alas ... was not meant to be. Poor da Sock):
The Sock with Big Ben and Parliament:
The Sock with Tower Bridge:
The Sock with the Eiffel Tour:
The Sock having a picnic in the park at the base of the Eiffel Tour. Wine, bread and cheese. Mmm mmm mmmm.
The Sock with Whistler's Mother at the Musee De Orsay:
The Sock with Tony, the hot Brazilian bartender in Paris. (sorry the picture is so blurry but I was laughing so hard taking it because I kept hearing Buck mumbling "please God, put. The. Sock. away! Don't do it! Don't do it! Don't do it!!" ...lol)
The Sock exhausted and waiting to board the plane home:
Sweet home Oregon-a. The Sock with the "Welcome to Oregon" sign:
And there ya have it ... The Sock's Excellent European Adventure!!!
Friday, September 30, 2005
Thursday, September 29, 2005
Green Day Rocks!
Okay, folks ... being that I am still without digital camera battery charger ... and hence can't get my 261 Europe pics to offload (ACK!) ... I thought I would rave about the Green Day concert last night! Because, holy criminey, those boys know how to throw one helluva par-tay!!
First off, my friends and I get there about 6:45pm (show starts at 7pm) to find The Line From Hell to get in. Seriously. If you can imagine, say, the line to get to the one candybar machine on an island teeming with 100,000 PMSing women ...... ... and double the size of the line in your head ..... your line will STILL be shorter than the one I saw last night. I kid you not.
But luckily, a security guard observed our look of despair and noted that, since we had General Admission FLOOR tickets (that's right, baby!), we didn't have to wait in TLFH but could head on over to our very own "special" entrance with The Line Of Only About Twenty People. How awesome is THAT??
So after getting searched, patted down, interrogated, hole-punched (the ticket only), wristbanded and told to show wristband AND ticket practically every ten feet ... we made it in! WHOOO HOOOOOOO.
Jimmy Eat World opened and did a great job.
Then came Green Day. A band I've enjoyed and listened to for years but for some reason have never ever seen in concert before (no, I don't know why). They rocked! And being with the crowd on the floor was AWESOME because we were ThisClose. (well, if T1 or I had a camera phone I could show you ... but for a big name band concert ... take my word for it ... we were close)
A couple of interesting tidbits:
-Pyrotechnics at a non-KISS concert?? Odd. Especially at a punk show. But yet Green Day made it work.
-Seriously, at what point did the blue lights of cell phone displays replace lighters at concerts?? Because I've seen one or two before but not the entire venue filled with these lights. Man, I'm old. It's official! (again!)
-The coolest thing: for one song ("Knowledge" ... an Operation Ivy cover?) Billie Joe stopped the show and requested a drummer, a bass player and a guitar player from the audience. He took his time selecting the three volunteers and brought them on stage. They then had to learn a couple of quick chord progressions and then Billie Joe sang the rest of the song while they played. HOLY COW ... that ROCKED! The crowd went wild! How absolutely COOL for those three folks whom are, more than likely, aspiring band members themselves. I mean, can you imagine??? Plus, the kid (I'm guessing teenager), who was chosen to be the guitar player (and who picked up the notes he was supposed to play after Billie Joe showed him it only once), just commanded the stage. He looked like he was having SUCH a great time! At the end Billie Joe let him keep the guitar. The kid was floored. It was awesome!*
Green Day played over two hours total. All awesome! For the last song of the encore, the rest of the band left the stage and Billie Joe alone played "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)". Incredible ending to an incredible show.
If they are coming to your town, do yourself a favor and go see them. I'm thinking that concert would rank in my top 10 concerts. (even though I don't have an official listing of top 10 concerts ... I'm pretty sure this would be one)
And I'm not just saying that because Billie Joe showed his bare bum. Nope, really! ;)
*I know, I know ... I've since learned that they do this at all the shows on this tour. But still, VERY cool.
First off, my friends and I get there about 6:45pm (show starts at 7pm) to find The Line From Hell to get in. Seriously. If you can imagine, say, the line to get to the one candybar machine on an island teeming with 100,000 PMSing women ...... ... and double the size of the line in your head ..... your line will STILL be shorter than the one I saw last night. I kid you not.
But luckily, a security guard observed our look of despair and noted that, since we had General Admission FLOOR tickets (that's right, baby!), we didn't have to wait in TLFH but could head on over to our very own "special" entrance with The Line Of Only About Twenty People. How awesome is THAT??
So after getting searched, patted down, interrogated, hole-punched (the ticket only), wristbanded and told to show wristband AND ticket practically every ten feet ... we made it in! WHOOO HOOOOOOO.
Jimmy Eat World opened and did a great job.
Then came Green Day. A band I've enjoyed and listened to for years but for some reason have never ever seen in concert before (no, I don't know why). They rocked! And being with the crowd on the floor was AWESOME because we were ThisClose. (well, if T1 or I had a camera phone I could show you ... but for a big name band concert ... take my word for it ... we were close)
A couple of interesting tidbits:
-Pyrotechnics at a non-KISS concert?? Odd. Especially at a punk show. But yet Green Day made it work.
-Seriously, at what point did the blue lights of cell phone displays replace lighters at concerts?? Because I've seen one or two before but not the entire venue filled with these lights. Man, I'm old. It's official! (again!)
-The coolest thing: for one song ("Knowledge" ... an Operation Ivy cover?) Billie Joe stopped the show and requested a drummer, a bass player and a guitar player from the audience. He took his time selecting the three volunteers and brought them on stage. They then had to learn a couple of quick chord progressions and then Billie Joe sang the rest of the song while they played. HOLY COW ... that ROCKED! The crowd went wild! How absolutely COOL for those three folks whom are, more than likely, aspiring band members themselves. I mean, can you imagine??? Plus, the kid (I'm guessing teenager), who was chosen to be the guitar player (and who picked up the notes he was supposed to play after Billie Joe showed him it only once), just commanded the stage. He looked like he was having SUCH a great time! At the end Billie Joe let him keep the guitar. The kid was floored. It was awesome!*
Green Day played over two hours total. All awesome! For the last song of the encore, the rest of the band left the stage and Billie Joe alone played "Good Riddance (Time of Your Life)". Incredible ending to an incredible show.
If they are coming to your town, do yourself a favor and go see them. I'm thinking that concert would rank in my top 10 concerts. (even though I don't have an official listing of top 10 concerts ... I'm pretty sure this would be one)
And I'm not just saying that because Billie Joe showed his bare bum. Nope, really! ;)
*I know, I know ... I've since learned that they do this at all the shows on this tour. But still, VERY cool.
Wednesday, September 28, 2005
Sweet Home Oregon-a
Sweet home Oregon-a,
Oh sweet home baby,
Sweet home Oregon-a,
Where the skies are so blue (errr, or grey.... whatever)*
:)
I'm home, baby!!!! Whoo hooo! Though I love to travel ... no matter how long I'm gone nor how far I go ... it's just always great to get home!
The Sock and I had a fabulous time! I took 261 pictures (no, no ... don't panic ... I won't make you see ALL of them! ;)) and will be sharing those pics with you as soon as I can:
1) find my camera battery charger
or
2) buy a new one
Because somewhere between "The Packing" and "The Walking Out the Front Door" for this trip, I misplaced my charger. I distinctly remember having it in my hand the night before I left and then voila ... it is no more. Sigh.
(perhaps The Charger is terrified of flying? Or wanted internationally and knew it would be caught in customs??)
And now, the camera ... she is dead.
Speaking of lost chargers, I'd like to send a shout out to the sales clerk in the camera section of Harrods department store in London for offering up to recharge my battery for me while I shopped. (*shout out*). If not for Harrods, the photo taking portion of this vacation would have ended sometime around Day 2 London. :)
Anyway, just wanted to give a quick update. I am off to the Green Day concert in an hour or two and must find a complete outfit of clean clothing which to wear (this could take some doing! ;))
Back to work tomorrow :( but back to superfast internet connectivity too!!! :)
*my apologies to Lynyrd Skynyrd for desecrating his 'Sweet Home Alabama'
Oh sweet home baby,
Sweet home Oregon-a,
Where the skies are so blue (errr, or grey.... whatever)*
:)
I'm home, baby!!!! Whoo hooo! Though I love to travel ... no matter how long I'm gone nor how far I go ... it's just always great to get home!
The Sock and I had a fabulous time! I took 261 pictures (no, no ... don't panic ... I won't make you see ALL of them! ;)) and will be sharing those pics with you as soon as I can:
1) find my camera battery charger
or
2) buy a new one
Because somewhere between "The Packing" and "The Walking Out the Front Door" for this trip, I misplaced my charger. I distinctly remember having it in my hand the night before I left and then voila ... it is no more. Sigh.
(perhaps The Charger is terrified of flying? Or wanted internationally and knew it would be caught in customs??)
And now, the camera ... she is dead.
Speaking of lost chargers, I'd like to send a shout out to the sales clerk in the camera section of Harrods department store in London for offering up to recharge my battery for me while I shopped. (*shout out*). If not for Harrods, the photo taking portion of this vacation would have ended sometime around Day 2 London. :)
Anyway, just wanted to give a quick update. I am off to the Green Day concert in an hour or two and must find a complete outfit of clean clothing which to wear (this could take some doing! ;))
Back to work tomorrow :( but back to superfast internet connectivity too!!! :)
*my apologies to Lynyrd Skynyrd for desecrating his 'Sweet Home Alabama'
Saturday, September 24, 2005
Greetings from Paris!!!!
Having a grand time! Beautiful city - fabulous art - fab fashions - crappy keyboards. :)
Trying to type this in a cyber cafe near Notre Dame but these keyboards are driving me crazy! They seem to have taken the letters I use most and shuffled them around. Punctuation too. So I have to keep stopping and backspacing to retype.
For instance, you may or may not recognize the following sentence:
The auick brozn fox ju,ped over the lqwy dog;
See? I typed that using the keystrokes I'm accustomed to. They change the keys around just enough on ya to let you get rollin' ...then screw with ya!!!! ;)
Anyway, The Sock visited both The Louvre and The Musee de Orsay today. Loved both. It's not quite as tired as I am. Cuz man, are my dogs barkin'!!!! ;)
More later.
Trying to type this in a cyber cafe near Notre Dame but these keyboards are driving me crazy! They seem to have taken the letters I use most and shuffled them around. Punctuation too. So I have to keep stopping and backspacing to retype.
For instance, you may or may not recognize the following sentence:
The auick brozn fox ju,ped over the lqwy dog;
See? I typed that using the keystrokes I'm accustomed to. They change the keys around just enough on ya to let you get rollin' ...then screw with ya!!!! ;)
Anyway, The Sock visited both The Louvre and The Musee de Orsay today. Loved both. It's not quite as tired as I am. Cuz man, are my dogs barkin'!!!! ;)
More later.
Tuesday, September 20, 2005
Greetings from New York City
Hey all!!!
Greetings from New York City! I have much to share with you but unfortunately can't upload pictures so the full stories will need to wait. But there will be mentions of things such as:
Good God, The Trash!
Fuckin' Kids!
I'm a Geek!
"Budget" Hotel or "Shithole" ... you decide!
Oh the Stairs!
And of course, The Sock Does Manhattan!
Off to London tonight! More later!
Greetings from New York City! I have much to share with you but unfortunately can't upload pictures so the full stories will need to wait. But there will be mentions of things such as:
Good God, The Trash!
Fuckin' Kids!
I'm a Geek!
"Budget" Hotel or "Shithole" ... you decide!
Oh the Stairs!
And of course, The Sock Does Manhattan!
Off to London tonight! More later!
Friday, September 16, 2005
The Sock's Excellent European Adventure - Starts Today!
And don't think The Sock isn't excited about it! It's been gathering its essentials in preparation.
Here it is checking on its passport:
Looks like it is all in order...
So The Sock is ready to go!
I, on the other hand, am not ready AT ALL. Because instead of packing and doing laundry and getting all the last minute things done that need to be done when one will be gone for a couple of weeks, I've been busy trying to figure out Photoshop* so I could make a fake passport for The Sock! Hello? .... can you say "PROCRASTINATION"??. Because everyone knows that a fake passport (for a SOCK, no less) is OH SO MUCH MORE important than actually doing the Need To stuff, dontcha know?! :)
BUT ... with or without the packed socks and undies .... I am heading out!!! Whoo hoooo! Europe, here I come!!!
Which leads me to this next bit .......
To all you loyal readers out there (I love each and every one of you!) ... I may not be able to blog for 2 whole weeks. ARGH!!!! I will TRY to .... (because hello?... no internet for 2 weeks! ... can someone survive that?! Is there a patch to help with the withdrawal symptoms? Anything? ACK!).... but I'm unsure of what access I'll have. So the next two weeks may be hit and miss ... but after that ... you will be bombarded! I'm sure there will be plenty of Dorkiness stories to share. Because me, in a country in which I don't speak the language, The Dorkiness is simply inevitable!!! And I look forward to sharing the many stories and pictures with all y'all when I get back! So stay tuned!
Take care all!
*thanks, Buck, for assisting when I got stuck!!
Here it is checking on its passport:
Looks like it is all in order...
So The Sock is ready to go!
I, on the other hand, am not ready AT ALL. Because instead of packing and doing laundry and getting all the last minute things done that need to be done when one will be gone for a couple of weeks, I've been busy trying to figure out Photoshop* so I could make a fake passport for The Sock! Hello? .... can you say "PROCRASTINATION"??. Because everyone knows that a fake passport (for a SOCK, no less) is OH SO MUCH MORE important than actually doing the Need To stuff, dontcha know?! :)
BUT ... with or without the packed socks and undies .... I am heading out!!! Whoo hoooo! Europe, here I come!!!
Which leads me to this next bit .......
To all you loyal readers out there (I love each and every one of you!) ... I may not be able to blog for 2 whole weeks. ARGH!!!! I will TRY to .... (because hello?... no internet for 2 weeks! ... can someone survive that?! Is there a patch to help with the withdrawal symptoms? Anything? ACK!).... but I'm unsure of what access I'll have. So the next two weeks may be hit and miss ... but after that ... you will be bombarded! I'm sure there will be plenty of Dorkiness stories to share. Because me, in a country in which I don't speak the language, The Dorkiness is simply inevitable!!! And I look forward to sharing the many stories and pictures with all y'all when I get back! So stay tuned!
Take care all!
*thanks, Buck, for assisting when I got stuck!!
Thursday, September 15, 2005
It's a COW. C-O-W.
Anybody else ever have days where it feels like you are surrounded by people like this guy? Anyone? Anyone??
Hello, buddy! It's a COW! C-O-W. Put. Your. Hand. DOWN! ARGH!!!!
(Thanks Far Side for the funny)
Hello, buddy! It's a COW! C-O-W. Put. Your. Hand. DOWN! ARGH!!!!
(Thanks Far Side for the funny)
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
AGAIN with The Exposing!
It happened AGAIN, folks! WHY? WHY do all y'all keep letting me go back to the store in which The Girls were exposed? Because now ... today ... another Exposing. And not The Girls this time. This had to do with The Zipper being down. All the way down. Completely open and gaping. Yep.
Why me? And what with the cameras ... and already the film of The Girls on display as I wandered the store ... seriously .... why do y'all let me out of the house every morning? You should be offering assistance ... like a Keeper or something. Ya know, because it's obvious that help is needed here! Seriously!!
And this time I'm left wondering just how long The Zipper was down today. Because I KNOW I didn't just use the restroom and then leave straight for lunch. There was time wandering around the office in between. Ruh-roh ... there was also the CEO coming into my office to discuss a client and me putting feet up on desk to lean back while discussing. Uh yeah ... can you say "pants gaping open"??? Was the restroom before or after that?? Before or after??? Oh GOD, I DON'T REMEMBER!!!!
Oh man .... now I need a new grocery store AND a new job. CRAP! What panties am I wearing? Please lord, let there be panties! Whew! At least there is that!
Seriously .... I'm taking applications for a Keeper. It's either that or I need to start dressing only in pull-on pants and pull-over sweatshirts, I'm thinkin'.
Why me? And what with the cameras ... and already the film of The Girls on display as I wandered the store ... seriously .... why do y'all let me out of the house every morning? You should be offering assistance ... like a Keeper or something. Ya know, because it's obvious that help is needed here! Seriously!!
And this time I'm left wondering just how long The Zipper was down today. Because I KNOW I didn't just use the restroom and then leave straight for lunch. There was time wandering around the office in between. Ruh-roh ... there was also the CEO coming into my office to discuss a client and me putting feet up on desk to lean back while discussing. Uh yeah ... can you say "pants gaping open"??? Was the restroom before or after that?? Before or after??? Oh GOD, I DON'T REMEMBER!!!!
Oh man .... now I need a new grocery store AND a new job. CRAP! What panties am I wearing? Please lord, let there be panties! Whew! At least there is that!
Seriously .... I'm taking applications for a Keeper. It's either that or I need to start dressing only in pull-on pants and pull-over sweatshirts, I'm thinkin'.
Hello, people?! .. are ya CRAZY?!
Why? Why is there so much of The Craziness?? I just don't get it. Here are a couple I spotted today.....
From Time Magazine:
Alleged Drunk Driver Jumps Into Back Seat
"CANBERRA, Australia Sep 12, 2005 Â An allegedly drunk driver stunned pursuing police in northern Australia by jumping into the back seat with his three passengers, leaving his car to careen out of control on an Outback road, police said Monday."
"Jenkinson said the driver's hazardous maneuver was aimed at avoiding arrest.
'His cunning plan, in his muddled state of mind, was he wouldn't be the driver,' Jenkinson said."
[Right. Because, yeah, The Police ... they won't notice you jumping into the back seat. Nope. They'll just think the car was magically driving itself. Good plan, Drunk Guy. And safe too, might I add! Nice of you to risk the lives of your friends like that. Sheer brilliance!! Bravo! Surprised it didn't work.]
Charged With Statutory Rape in Nebraska After Marrying Pregnant 14-Year-Old Girlfriend in Kansas
"Sept. 13, 2005 -- In May, Matthew Koso married his girlfriend, Crystal, who was pregnant with their child. But the new father and husband may soon be separated from his family and sent to prison. His crime? Koso is 22; Crystal is 14."
"Matthew first met Crystal through her half-brother, and they began dating in the fall of 2003 when he was 20 and she was 12. [hello, parents? Where are ya??] She was 13 when she became pregnant and 14 when she married Matthew in Kansas, one of only a few states that allows children as young as 12 to marry with parental consent.
'At that time, our options were limited,' said Matthew's mother, Peggy Koso. 'It was either abortion, which was well past due; adoption, which was out of the question; and then it was to marry her, which we thought was the right thing to do.' [uhhhhhh, adoption was out of the question but having your 14 year old marry a pedophile (and probably a soon-to-be convicted felon) to raise the baby wasn't?? What color is the sky in your world again??]
Falls City, Neb., is a town of 4,600 about 100 miles south of Omaha. Crystal described it as a place of few opportunities.
'Here in Falls City you have two choices: go get drunk or high and die in a car accident or of an overdose, or go get pregnant,' she [the bride] said. 'So which is the wrong choice?' [thinking those are your only two choices, I'm thinkin'. How about .... NOT go get pregnant and DON'T do drugs? I vote we throw that in there as Option C. But I'm crazy like that.]
From Time Magazine:
Yak-skiing in Manali, India
(A person on skis and holding a bucket of nuts is attached to a yak by a long rope fixed to a pulley on a hilltop, with the yak near the top and the skier far below. The skier rattles the bucket loudly to infuriate the yak, which then charges down, yanking the skier rapidly uphill.)
[What the hell, people?? That takes a whole 'nother kinda crazy. The special kind]
Monday, September 12, 2005
I do not hate men!
Really! I just wanted to preface this joke by saying that.
But I just got this in and thought it was too funny not to share! Enjoy! :)
But I just got this in and thought it was too funny not to share! Enjoy! :)
A woman gets home, screeches her car into the driveway, runs into the house, slams the door and shouts at the top of her lungs, "John, pack your bags. I won the lottery!"
The husband says, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?"
"Doesn't matter," she says. "Just get the hell out."
Fast, FAST planes!
So I went to the Oregon International Airshow yesterday with a friend. I tried to take tons of pictures for all y'all of the cool jets as they flew by (go Thunderbirds!) but all I ended up with were pictures of pretty blue sky (apparently they fly f a s t and I take pictures slow! ;)).
But other than the jets that performed, my favorite performance was the U.S Army Golden Knights Parachute Team. These folks are C-R-A-Z-Y! Take for instance the first two skydivers. They jumped outta the plane, started the smoke coming off their feet so we could see them, shaped their bodies to be as aerodynamic as possible and dove away from each other until they were a quite a distance apart .... and then dove straight AT EACH OTHER ... each traveling at 180mph*! See? I've included a picture to show you!
(What?? What do you mean that's not a real photograph?!!! FINE! (hrmph). So apparently I'm not so quick at snapping photos of fast traveling people either.)
But really. 180mph heading straight at someone. I'm not sure of The Math and all (shut it ... yes I DO have a college minor in mathematics) but I'm thinking if person A leaves the plane traveling 180mph and person B leaves the plane traveling at 180mph and they collide at Point X. That equals "dead". Pretty sure.
Anyway, something that wasn't moving so fast that I couldn't take a picture of it was Grandpa (well, not MY Grandpa but surely someone's Grandpa). Take a gander at these suspenders! What a hoot, eh??
Huh? Spotted this booth at the airshow as well.....
Now, if I didn't know that the result of my inquiry to the person manning this booth would have been "you are not going to heaven if you were to die right now ... but if you give me loads of money and become a member of my cult then you'll at least have a chance!" I would have approached to see what the two questions were!
Other than that ... lots of sun, lots of fun ... and lots of men in uniform. Which really made for quite a good day!! I highly recommend it!! ;)
*now normally I thought skydivers traveled at 120mph but the "180mph" is a direct quote from the announcer ... so if it's wrong ... blame him! (however, really ... 120mph+120mph still equals "dead" I'm thinkin'!)
But other than the jets that performed, my favorite performance was the U.S Army Golden Knights Parachute Team. These folks are C-R-A-Z-Y! Take for instance the first two skydivers. They jumped outta the plane, started the smoke coming off their feet so we could see them, shaped their bodies to be as aerodynamic as possible and dove away from each other until they were a quite a distance apart .... and then dove straight AT EACH OTHER ... each traveling at 180mph*! See? I've included a picture to show you!
(What?? What do you mean that's not a real photograph?!!! FINE! (hrmph). So apparently I'm not so quick at snapping photos of fast traveling people either.)
But really. 180mph heading straight at someone. I'm not sure of The Math and all (shut it ... yes I DO have a college minor in mathematics) but I'm thinking if person A leaves the plane traveling 180mph and person B leaves the plane traveling at 180mph and they collide at Point X. That equals "dead". Pretty sure.
Anyway, something that wasn't moving so fast that I couldn't take a picture of it was Grandpa (well, not MY Grandpa but surely someone's Grandpa). Take a gander at these suspenders! What a hoot, eh??
Huh? Spotted this booth at the airshow as well.....
Now, if I didn't know that the result of my inquiry to the person manning this booth would have been "you are not going to heaven if you were to die right now ... but if you give me loads of money and become a member of my cult then you'll at least have a chance!" I would have approached to see what the two questions were!
Other than that ... lots of sun, lots of fun ... and lots of men in uniform. Which really made for quite a good day!! I highly recommend it!! ;)
*now normally I thought skydivers traveled at 120mph but the "180mph" is a direct quote from the announcer ... so if it's wrong ... blame him! (however, really ... 120mph+120mph still equals "dead" I'm thinkin'!)
Friday, September 09, 2005
A little Friday Craigslist for ya!
Okay, have never, EVER seen the following headline before (and I've seen some doosies ... lemme tell ya!) What do you think of this one?
Seeking nice girl with big nipples, or puffies
"Puffies"? Confounded me too. So I had to read on..........
Puffy nipples?? I need to get out more. Seriously. Puffy? Anyway, his "your pics get mine" left me wondering ... I mean, cuz it would seem he only really cares about what ONE part of you looks like. Do you just send a pic of those? Just askin'.
Heart broke and Lonely. - 35 (Westside) [again, what's with this opener to entice a woman? Crazy]
Well-Hung Italian Pool Boy seeks Financially Stable Older Women - 23 (Portland) [well, hear, hear! After all the old guys trying to buy younger women I post about ... here's the opposite. And yes, ladies .. it WOULD have been nice if this youngster had included a picture on his post. Dang him!]
are you smart, in shape, have big boobs, and smart??? - 30 [snicker. This one just makes me giggle with his double "smart" request. Not sure why. I could be loopy on too much sugar ;)]
Ah, but I didn't need to go to Craigslist to seek out "winners" this week. Had a couple come right to my mailbox .. oh yes I did. Here's my fave:
Okay, so at least this guy lasted another minute than my two other similar offers. Though I must admit that any man that refers to "screaming" (or "SCREANING" as the case here may be) scares the bejeebus outta me. In my book ... screaming is NOT good. I think tortuous. That would be bad. Might I recommend, Mr 5 Minute Guy, the phrase "shouting in ecstasy". It's not quite as serial killer. Oh, and along the same line ... all caps .... freaky. You might want to rethink that too. Just sayin'!
Seeking nice girl with big nipples, or puffies
"Puffies"? Confounded me too. So I had to read on..........
Reply to: anon-@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-09-09, 12:25PM PDT
I hope that title doesn't get this post pulled.
I'm looking for a girl with all the normally desirable qualities: smarts, good heart, and attractive looks. Someone who likes to laugh and has a positive outlook on life. Many people have certain traits they find especially attractive in members of the opposite sex. Some prefer a certain height, hair color, eye color, ethnicity, etc. In my case, it has to do with breasts. In all other respects I'm a normal guy who tries to do the right thing and cares about others.
So in addition to the other qualities I listed, what "does it for me"? Large nipples or puffy nipples [excuse me?]. If you have either of these wonderful attributes and would like to meet a great guy who will definitely appreaciate you, please drop me a line. (Your pics get mine.)
Puffy nipples?? I need to get out more. Seriously. Puffy? Anyway, his "your pics get mine" left me wondering ... I mean, cuz it would seem he only really cares about what ONE part of you looks like. Do you just send a pic of those? Just askin'.
Heart broke and Lonely. - 35 (Westside) [again, what's with this opener to entice a woman? Crazy]
Well-Hung Italian Pool Boy seeks Financially Stable Older Women - 23 (Portland) [well, hear, hear! After all the old guys trying to buy younger women I post about ... here's the opposite. And yes, ladies .. it WOULD have been nice if this youngster had included a picture on his post. Dang him!]
are you smart, in shape, have big boobs, and smart??? - 30 [snicker. This one just makes me giggle with his double "smart" request. Not sure why. I could be loopy on too much sugar ;)]
Ah, but I didn't need to go to Craigslist to seek out "winners" this week. Had a couple come right to my mailbox .. oh yes I did. Here's my fave:
JUST A CHANCE. GIVE ME 5 MINS I WOULD HAVE YOU SCREANING MY NAME OUT IN DESIRE
Okay, so at least this guy lasted another minute than my two other similar offers. Though I must admit that any man that refers to "screaming" (or "SCREANING" as the case here may be) scares the bejeebus outta me. In my book ... screaming is NOT good. I think tortuous. That would be bad. Might I recommend, Mr 5 Minute Guy, the phrase "shouting in ecstasy". It's not quite as serial killer. Oh, and along the same line ... all caps .... freaky. You might want to rethink that too. Just sayin'!
Thursday, September 08, 2005
This is scary
I only have one contact in today, folks. Yep, just one. You know why I only have one contact in today?? Here's my theory:
In the fraction of a second it takes to go from "having just put the left eye contact in" to "reaching down to pick up the right eye contact", I got distracted. Yep, in the fraction of a second.
And no, I don't know by what. I'm guessing it must have been something really shiny.
Because there was no smoke detector alarm screaming.
There was no phone ringing.
There was no doorbell blaring.
There was no crash of something knocked over by one of the cats.
There was absolutely bupkus, folks. And yet, here ... me ... only one contact. What the F?
Seriously, it may be time to put me down. Just sayin'.
In the fraction of a second it takes to go from "having just put the left eye contact in" to "reaching down to pick up the right eye contact", I got distracted. Yep, in the fraction of a second.
And no, I don't know by what. I'm guessing it must have been something really shiny.
Because there was no smoke detector alarm screaming.
There was no phone ringing.
There was no doorbell blaring.
There was no crash of something knocked over by one of the cats.
There was absolutely bupkus, folks. And yet, here ... me ... only one contact. What the F?
Seriously, it may be time to put me down. Just sayin'.
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
Random Ponderings
- What do the Chinese Fortune Cookie Gods mean with this fortune they gave me recently??
- What is up with me and purling?? Man, what a s-t-r-u-g-g-l-e! I'm down to the heel flap on Sock#2 - The Mate in which every other row needs to be purled. So I managed to do one ... yes ONE ... purl row last night. When I came to the next purl row I couldn't endure the torture. At this rate ... I should be done with Sock#2 - The Mate by the year 2010!
- Why - oh why- was the host of Rock Star INXS wearing a negligee last night to mc the show? Really.
- Why can't I find Adam Ant's "Stand and Deliver" song out there on the internet? I mean, I KNOW I could just buy the cd. But I'm just sayin' ... I just need this one song right now. Just the one. Must listen to. Can't find it. Legally or illegally! BAH!
- Who got me started on the Harry Potter book series?? Because really, y'all know I can't put down a book once I'm into it. So last night ... nothing got done. Just reading. I'm on book 4. Y'all suck. That I'm actually showered and here at work instead of at home finishing the book took great Herculean effort ... don't think it didn't.
- Is it wrong that my new favorite quote of the week "I am the life of my party" I got from my Dittie's thong pantyliner backing??
- Will I be too embarrassed to have a new man stay the night now that I have a new habit of asking my cats if they are ready "to go night-night" when I'm getting ready for bed?
- Should I not have blogged about the "night-night" bit?
- What about the thong pantyliners??
- Is blogging while feeling shameless the same as grocery shopping while you're hungry?
"The moment you were born, a problem was solved"
Tuesday, September 06, 2005
The Spirit of New Orleans!
Just received an email update regarding my sister's friend Barbie (from New Orleans). Thought I would share.
___________________________________________________________
On a related note: You go, Portland!
Portland, Oregon has stepped up to house some of the Katrina refugees (man, it just doesn't feel right using that word to describe fellow Americans). I was talking to a paramedic friend yesterday and he said over 100 had arrived already this weekend (4 of which immediately had to be sent off to surgery!) and more were coming. This article says we're taking in 1000 but the paramedic said he thought 2000.
How weird would that be to be thrown on a jet and whisked off to be housed in a strange state/city?? Very, VERY weird, right?
Anyway, welcome folks! Portland is a beautiful city. But very different from New Orleans. Some of you will love it (and end up staying?). Some of you may hate it and take the first bus out. But to all of you ... I hope you can at least find some temporary comfort and rest. I'm sure you haven't had much of that lately.
we are still in baton rouge and probably will not be able to return for a few months..just taking it a day at a time. i cried all day sunday..john and bert were out of the house so i just let it out..feel better too..i dont care about what i may have lost i am just enraged about this needless tragedy that has unfolded.You go, New Orleans!!!
on a funny note..there is this local bar in the quarter...johnny whites..they refuse to close for anything..well, they are still open and serving warm beer..with every beer you get an mre!!! also, this weekend was suppose to be southern decadence..some people who stayed held a decadence parade on sunday..that the new orleans spirit..
___________________________________________________________
On a related note: You go, Portland!
Portland, Oregon has stepped up to house some of the Katrina refugees (man, it just doesn't feel right using that word to describe fellow Americans). I was talking to a paramedic friend yesterday and he said over 100 had arrived already this weekend (4 of which immediately had to be sent off to surgery!) and more were coming. This article says we're taking in 1000 but the paramedic said he thought 2000.
How weird would that be to be thrown on a jet and whisked off to be housed in a strange state/city?? Very, VERY weird, right?
Anyway, welcome folks! Portland is a beautiful city. But very different from New Orleans. Some of you will love it (and end up staying?). Some of you may hate it and take the first bus out. But to all of you ... I hope you can at least find some temporary comfort and rest. I'm sure you haven't had much of that lately.
Monday, September 05, 2005
Labor Day Weekend Oddities
And this little piggy went diggin'.......
So, while shopping one day I spotted this statue:
My first thought: "what the hell is it??".
But once I determined that it was indeed a pig (you may need to just trust me on this one) I thought, "my, wouldn't that be a conversational piece".
So I picked it up to take a closer look and thought: "why is its one arm behind its back?".
And so I turned it around.
HELLO??! Did someone REALLY make a statue of a pig which is picking its behind???
Yes! YES they did! My next thought (granted, this is an obvious one): "But WHY???????"
Portland: The Big Little City:
Happened to be walkin' by and caught this sign! It reminded me so much of the movie 'Vegas Vacation' with Chevy Chase. Did y'all see that one? Cuz ya know, the part where he goes with Cousin Eddie to the local casino to find games like: War, Guess What Number I'm Thinkin Of, etc.
Well right here in good ole Portland we've got us a Rock-Paper-Scissors tournament! That's right! How's that for 'high-falutin'??!!
Now, had they partnered that with a Go Fish tournie, I just might have had to enter!
Introducing The World's Shortest Skirt!
I don't think I've ever seen a shorter skirt. EVER! Seriously! I mean, this skirt is SO short .....(how. short. is. it???) ....that not only would my ass hang out the bottom but so would my boobs!*
But the oddest thing:
But the oddest thing was catching Emma looking cute!
Of course, Da Evil was back immediately after I snapped the picture. Apparently, she's not real keen on a flash going off unexpectantly in her eyes. Who knew??!! :)
Hope y'all had a great Labor Day Weekend everyone!
*Now, to the people I know: consider this a Preemptive Hush-It with regard to this boob comment. I don't need any Peanut Gallery comments, such as: "but, Kat, your boobs aren't big enough to hang out the bottom of even a mini halter top let alone a mini skirt!". I know this. It was just a jokie. Consider it Creative License, okay? :)
So, while shopping one day I spotted this statue:
My first thought: "what the hell is it??".
But once I determined that it was indeed a pig (you may need to just trust me on this one) I thought, "my, wouldn't that be a conversational piece".
So I picked it up to take a closer look and thought: "why is its one arm behind its back?".
And so I turned it around.
HELLO??! Did someone REALLY make a statue of a pig which is picking its behind???
Yes! YES they did! My next thought (granted, this is an obvious one): "But WHY???????"
Portland: The Big Little City:
Happened to be walkin' by and caught this sign! It reminded me so much of the movie 'Vegas Vacation' with Chevy Chase. Did y'all see that one? Cuz ya know, the part where he goes with Cousin Eddie to the local casino to find games like: War, Guess What Number I'm Thinkin Of, etc.
Well right here in good ole Portland we've got us a Rock-Paper-Scissors tournament! That's right! How's that for 'high-falutin'??!!
Now, had they partnered that with a Go Fish tournie, I just might have had to enter!
Introducing The World's Shortest Skirt!
I don't think I've ever seen a shorter skirt. EVER! Seriously! I mean, this skirt is SO short .....(how. short. is. it???) ....that not only would my ass hang out the bottom but so would my boobs!*
But the oddest thing:
But the oddest thing was catching Emma looking cute!
Of course, Da Evil was back immediately after I snapped the picture. Apparently, she's not real keen on a flash going off unexpectantly in her eyes. Who knew??!! :)
Hope y'all had a great Labor Day Weekend everyone!
*Now, to the people I know: consider this a Preemptive Hush-It with regard to this boob comment. I don't need any Peanut Gallery comments, such as: "but, Kat, your boobs aren't big enough to hang out the bottom of even a mini halter top let alone a mini skirt!". I know this. It was just a jokie. Consider it Creative License, okay? :)
Friday, September 02, 2005
Cute Dog Quotes
For a little needed levity:
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
- Rita Rudner
Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never bathed a dog.
- Franklin P.
If your dog is fat, YOU aren't getting enough exercise.
- Unknown
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can.
That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
- Joe Weinstein
Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? ! We come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!
- Anne Tyler
You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'
- Dave Barry
Dogs are not our whole life, but they do make our lives whole.
- Roger Caras
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them.
- Phil Pastoret
My goal in life is to be as good of a person as my dog already thinks I am.
- Unknown
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.
- Rita Rudner
Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never bathed a dog.
- Franklin P.
If your dog is fat, YOU aren't getting enough exercise.
- Unknown
My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can.
That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
- Joe Weinstein
Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? ! We come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!
- Anne Tyler
You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, 'My God, you're right! I never would've thought of that!'
- Dave Barry
Dogs are not our whole life, but they do make our lives whole.
- Roger Caras
If you think dogs can't count, try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket and then giving Fido only two of them.
- Phil Pastoret
My goal in life is to be as good of a person as my dog already thinks I am.
- Unknown
Toto, I've a feeling we're not in America anymore
From the front page of ABCNEW.com this morning:
This is Day Five.
This is America.
This is unacceptable*.
*World stunned as US struggles with Katrina
"In the city, corpses rotted along flooded sidewalks and bands of armed thugs roamed the streets..."
This is Day Five.
This is America.
This is unacceptable*.
*World stunned as US struggles with Katrina
Thursday, September 01, 2005
The Good, The Bad and The Ugly
This New Orleans thing is bad, folks. B-A-D. And it is getting worse. The Ugly is coming out in folks. Looting. Robbing medical facilities. Shooting at rescuers. And the straw that broke the camel's back with me today ..... the gas stations in other states charging $6 per gallon (national average being $2.61 approx) for gasoline. I was Pissed (yes, that's Pissed with a Capital P).
How DARE all these people not only take advantage of this HORRIBLE situation .... but make it so much worse. Do y'all know that the police force in New Orleans has been called off of search and rescue (as in "saving lives") because the looters are becoming so aggressive that they can no longer be ignored????? Hello? Does no one else have a problem with this??
And so I was frustrated. And bummed. And helpless to do anything about it (number one priority being to Bitch Slap these Folks With The Ugly and yell "WTF do you THINK you are DOING??? WHY??? Seriously, WTF?????? S-T-O-P I-T!!!!!")
But then I realized that there must be a lot of good going on too. Heroic rescues. Strangers helping strangers. That sort of thing. And so I consulted with Craigslist. And I have found The Good. In fact, there were soooo many to choose from that I am only including a very tiny sampling. Seriously. VERY TINY SAMPLING.
2br - Offer of free townhome to Katrina victims only
We have a 2 bedroom, 2 1/2 bath townhome in Marathon Fl available immediately through December 15th for any victims of Katrina who truly need it. This unit is fully furnished, sleeps 4 and it would be our honor to help someone out who needs it.
2br - Want to help a family with hurricane losses...
Will provide resources for family to start over. Up to 2 adults and 2 kids. Must be willing to relocate to Pittsburgh area (we can transport you).
WILLING TO FOSTER DISPLACED ANIMALS
I do animal rescue in the Portland, Oregon area, and I'm willing to foster up to 3 cats/kittens
Free. Seattle. I can probably get you here
I'm looking for a person displaced by the catastrophe who would either like a new start in a beautiful city or at least a few month break while things settle down. I have a room to offer and, depending on where you are, can probably get you here as well.
Let me know if I can help
3Br. Basement Apartment for Katrina Victims Only
3 Bedroom Apartment in Knoxville, Tennessee Available to Victims of Katrina. It is unfurnished, but we will find furniture for you, if necessary. Available through December if needed at no cost to you (free)
KATRINA: house available free
Will send items wherever needed
I have dolls, teddy bears, some women's clothing, kitchen gadgets, some blankets, towels, etc. I can send wherever they are needed, if you can provide an address. If you can read this, you are among the fortunate with Internet access. Even if you don't need something, ask around to those who can't get online and see what they need and post it. I'll do whatever I can.
2br - New Chicago Condos Available for KATRINA Survivors
FREE.. a new start in Boston!!!!! Katrina victims
I can help contacting your family by phone
Free food and shelter, with jobs in Rhode Island. KATRINA folks only
Free food and shelter to family with babies and/or children. Job opportunities for their parents. (2 huge national companies nearby just started hiring 500+ people for new office positions.) Pets welcome. Stay for up to a year.
California family will foster your dog: Katrina victims only, please
We have room for you in our home...will pick up [these people live in California!]
We want to help!! We have room for family, single parent family, or individual children. No Rent. We can come get you. Will also help you contact friends and family.
Can Email and Phone For You - Anywhere in US / Canada
Need something? Ask I'll see what I can do
I'm in Virginia, but I want to help any way possible. If you need anything, please just ask. If it's too big for me to handle - I'll get more people involved. May even be able to offer a bedroom. Diapers, water, formula, clothes, bus ticket, toothbrushes, anything.
Pet Care For Volunteers [this is an awesome way you can help from your own home]
If any volunteers going to help Katrina victims could use help with their Philly-staying pets, I'd be happy to help. I'm in downtown Philly.
Pilot and Small Airplane Available for Relief
Can use for Disaster Relief
Want to help - let us know how
You rock, Good People! You ROCK! Thank you!
And Katrina Victims, if there is anything I can do to help, please let me know. I can pet sit for local volunteers, I can help contact people for you, I've got a spare room (errr, though you'd probably want to not be allergic to yarn and cats .... oh, and probably, maybe, just sayin' and all ... a few dust bunnies! ;)).
How DARE all these people not only take advantage of this HORRIBLE situation .... but make it so much worse. Do y'all know that the police force in New Orleans has been called off of search and rescue (as in "saving lives") because the looters are becoming so aggressive that they can no longer be ignored????? Hello? Does no one else have a problem with this??
And so I was frustrated. And bummed. And helpless to do anything about it (number one priority being to Bitch Slap these Folks With The Ugly and yell "WTF do you THINK you are DOING??? WHY??? Seriously, WTF?????? S-T-O-P I-T!!!!!")
But then I realized that there must be a lot of good going on too. Heroic rescues. Strangers helping strangers. That sort of thing. And so I consulted with Craigslist. And I have found The Good. In fact, there were soooo many to choose from that I am only including a very tiny sampling. Seriously. VERY TINY SAMPLING.
2br - Offer of free townhome to Katrina victims only
We have a 2 bedroom, 2 1/2 bath townhome in Marathon Fl available immediately through December 15th for any victims of Katrina who truly need it. This unit is fully furnished, sleeps 4 and it would be our honor to help someone out who needs it.
2br - Want to help a family with hurricane losses...
Will provide resources for family to start over. Up to 2 adults and 2 kids. Must be willing to relocate to Pittsburgh area (we can transport you).
WILLING TO FOSTER DISPLACED ANIMALS
I do animal rescue in the Portland, Oregon area, and I'm willing to foster up to 3 cats/kittens
Free. Seattle. I can probably get you here
I'm looking for a person displaced by the catastrophe who would either like a new start in a beautiful city or at least a few month break while things settle down. I have a room to offer and, depending on where you are, can probably get you here as well.
Let me know if I can help
3Br. Basement Apartment for Katrina Victims Only
3 Bedroom Apartment in Knoxville, Tennessee Available to Victims of Katrina. It is unfurnished, but we will find furniture for you, if necessary. Available through December if needed at no cost to you (free)
KATRINA: house available free
Will send items wherever needed
I have dolls, teddy bears, some women's clothing, kitchen gadgets, some blankets, towels, etc. I can send wherever they are needed, if you can provide an address. If you can read this, you are among the fortunate with Internet access. Even if you don't need something, ask around to those who can't get online and see what they need and post it. I'll do whatever I can.
2br - New Chicago Condos Available for KATRINA Survivors
FREE.. a new start in Boston!!!!! Katrina victims
I can help contacting your family by phone
Free food and shelter, with jobs in Rhode Island. KATRINA folks only
Free food and shelter to family with babies and/or children. Job opportunities for their parents. (2 huge national companies nearby just started hiring 500+ people for new office positions.) Pets welcome. Stay for up to a year.
California family will foster your dog: Katrina victims only, please
We have room for you in our home...will pick up [these people live in California!]
We want to help!! We have room for family, single parent family, or individual children. No Rent. We can come get you. Will also help you contact friends and family.
Can Email and Phone For You - Anywhere in US / Canada
Need something? Ask I'll see what I can do
I'm in Virginia, but I want to help any way possible. If you need anything, please just ask. If it's too big for me to handle - I'll get more people involved. May even be able to offer a bedroom. Diapers, water, formula, clothes, bus ticket, toothbrushes, anything.
Pet Care For Volunteers [this is an awesome way you can help from your own home]
If any volunteers going to help Katrina victims could use help with their Philly-staying pets, I'd be happy to help. I'm in downtown Philly.
Pilot and Small Airplane Available for Relief
Can use for Disaster Relief
Want to help - let us know how
You rock, Good People! You ROCK! Thank you!
And Katrina Victims, if there is anything I can do to help, please let me know. I can pet sit for local volunteers, I can help contact people for you, I've got a spare room (errr, though you'd probably want to not be allergic to yarn and cats .... oh, and probably, maybe, just sayin' and all ... a few dust bunnies! ;)).
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)